Witness
It is the Holy Spirit who
has awakened me at the age of 16 to a deeper understanding and
experience of the love of God. I was a good Catholic girl,
loved my faith and thought I understood it then, but when people
were talking about the love of God I felt really uneasy, because
I did not really know this love, I had never experienced it.
One night, during a Christian
youth camp, I became very angry as I was listening to someone's
testimony telling us about the love of Jesus. I went out in
the night, in a field, and started to shout to God angrily,
telling him that if he did love me so, why should he leave it
to others to tell me about this extraordinary love - why couldn't
he tell it to me himself?
I put my whole faith at stake on a possible answer, and determined
in my heart that if he did not answer, I would stop believing
- or simply bothering - about him. The thought that this might
happen already left me with a deep deep void inside, a bleak
prospect. Of course, I did not hear a big voice coming from
the sky.
Someone came, who
was concerned about me, and she just prayed for me - I let her
do it, though I was very angry and upset, for the sake of getting
it over and done with. She prayed that the Holy Spirit would
come in my heart and my life. Nothing happened after that, and
I went to bed still in tears and exhausted.
In the morning, I woke up different. I think the Holy Spirit
did come and renewed and deepened in me the gift of faith that
I wanted so - faith in the love of God. Whereas in the evening
I had decided not to believe in this incredible love, in the
morning, there was nothing I was more certain of. It was completely
supernatural. I opened my bible, and everything became so clear,
so sure and so certain about God, his Son Jesus Christ, and
his love that is beyond telling. From that moment my faith
deepened and I grew more and more in love with God. It was then
my turn to drive people crazy by telling them about the love
of God. This adventure led me to become a religious, consecrated
to God in the order of St Dominic - who talked only with God
or about God.
READ
John 14:15-16
The Lord says,
”If you love me you will
keep my commandments.” He does not say: Here are the ten commandments:
morality is good for you. He speaks of love. He has already
told us in the first thirteen chapters of John that he loves
us. Now he says, If: If you love me. - Yes Lord. You know that
I love you - you will not find the commandments a problem because
the love we have for each other will make integrity not merely
possible, but easy. How could you love me and worship the idols
of success, power and money? How could you love me and drag
my name in the mud? How could you love me and not want to spend
time with me? How could you love me and not want to respect
the family I have given you, weak and human as they are? How
could you love me and then involve yourself in killing and lying
to people, tie yourself up in destructive relationships with
people whom you know I love deeply? How can you love me and
be everlastingly hankering after things and people that are
simply not for you?
You can’t.
Love me - and do what you
will. Because I have made it possible for you to do this I have
asked your Father to give you another counsellor; the Holy Spirit
of Truth.
The Spirit lived with the
people of the Old Testament; he still lives with those who do not
see him or know him. But for you who are made one with me in Baptism,
the Spirit does nor live with you, he lives in you. This is why
Pentecost is the birthday of the Church. The Spirit has always been
hovering over the waters, but now he has descended on you and remains
in you.
In tongues
of
fire
The Spirit’s tongue speaks in you. His fire warms you, gives you
light and burns away your dross. You live inside me, and I live
inside my Father. Because of my Spirit, when you speak and act,
people can hear and see me. This is love. This is passion.
Let us pray
Father,
we are in your Son,
and he is in you.
We have come from the east and west
to sit at your table,
in your kingdom that begins now
in your Spirit.
Amen.